


all I really know

by entelechies



Category: Naruto
Genre: Alternate Universe - Future, Fluff, M/M, two idiots one cave
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-01
Updated: 2021-02-01
Packaged: 2021-03-12 17:07:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,058
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29139030
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/entelechies/pseuds/entelechies
Summary: Kakashi plays hooky from his new job as hokage, and Kabuto catches him when others can't.
Relationships: Hatake Kakashi/Yakushi Kabuto
Comments: 5
Kudos: 8





	all I really know

This wasn’t the first time they had been in a situation like this, soaked to the bone, close together in a cave to keep out of the rain. In the past, they would have been traveling different directions. This time they’d head back the same way. And there’d never before been an occasion for Kabuto to come after _him_ , Kakashi realized.

Kakashi regarded Kabuto, kneeling in front of Kakashi with his hands above the gash on Kakashi’s right forearm. Kabuto’s features were lit from the green glow around his hands, their primary source of light in the darkness. The moonlight was fading. It would be dawn soon, Kakashi realized. The sun would be welcome. No one would want to be soaked through during the night.

Kakashi had expected an immediate lecture upon being found, but instead Kabuto’s eyes had gone to the wound and he’d gotten to work. He would have been teased and belittled until Kabuto ran out of steam, in the past. He would’ve been lucky for Kabuto to even agree to heal him, in the past.

He closed his eyes for a moment, admonishing himself in Kabuto’s place. This train of thought—living in the past—would go nowhere good when he was this tired.

The night was still, quiet aside from the sound of the rain outside and the droplets echoing through the cave. Humidity pressed against Kakashi’s skin like a cloud one moment, and a soft breeze blew by at the next.

“Do you have any other wounds?” Kabuto asked, breaking the relative silence. His voice was quiet, his gaze still on Kakashi’s arm.

Kakashi blinked his eyes open. He looked down at himself and patted down his chest and left thigh. “Hm.. I’m sure you’ll find something else later, but there’s nothing else actively bleeding.”

The corner of Kabuto’s mouth quirked up. “I’m sure you’re just saying that.”

Kakashi’s eyebrows came together as he frowned. “Now, what benefit would I get from hiding things like that from you?” he asked.

Kabuto looked up at him. “You’re being very quiet,” he said, as if explaining.

“So are you,” Kakashi countered.

“I’m concentrating.”

“Well…” Kakashi drawled, “I’m bleeding.”

Kabuto raised an eyebrow and exhaled: a short, full sigh. “You’re not anymore, I’m working on it.” Kakashi wasn’t sure if he actually saw a faint smile on Kabuto’s lips, or if he had just imagined it.

“And I thank you,” Kakashi said, dipping his head.

Kabuto didn’t reply.

Kakashi looked over him again. Kabuto was wearing jounin blacks and a flak jacket—one of his own old ones? It looked good on him, if out of place. Wait, it wasn’t one of his own, it was shorter, Kabuto had a shorter torso. Had he been issued his own? He wasn’t on active duty, nor would he likely ever be. It wasn’t uncommon for Kabuto to wear the blacks. It wasn’t like he had the time or interest in creating a wardrobe, and they didn’t do anything other than work.

 _Did_ he have interest in a wardrobe? Kakashi suddenly asked himself. Were there things he was overlooking? Is that why Kabuto was so silent? That wasn’t unusual either, but this silence seemed off, especially since—

“You didn’t tell me about this,” Kabuto said. He wasn’t looking at him; watching his hands again as Kakashi’s wound began to slowly close underneath his palms. His tone tightened. “The Hokage shouldn’t be out on A-ranked missions, and certainly not by himself.”

Kakashi shrugged a shoulder, starting to look away. “It needed to be done.”

“I assume the targets are dead, then?” Kabuto’s eyes snapped up, grabbing Kakashi’s gaze back. The glow of chakra around his hands abruptly disappeared. They weren’t immediately plunged into darkness - there was more light than Kakashi had thought.

“Of course,” Kakashi answered, wondering where this new conversation would lead. Chakra bloomed around Kabuto’s palms once more. Kabuto was spending far too much chakra and attention on this wound, Kakashi thought. “The issuer of the contract will be pleased,” Kakashi continued, his tone growing stiffer, “and the daimyo will be happy.”

At the mention of the daimyo, the chakra around Kabuto’s hands abruptly sputtered out. “The _daimyo_ ,” Kabuto muttered bitterly, repeating Kakashi words, fingers twitching once, “the daimyo—oh, they’ll be happy, that’s great.”

 _Oh_ , Kakashi thought slowly. Here was his lecture. He sat further back on his heels, body language and tone hardening to the defensive. “It needed to be taken care of.”

“By _other_ shinobi,” Kabuto snapped. “You’re hokage now, you can’t run off on a mission by yourself.” He paused, and his tone became less sharp when he continued, “and certainly not without telling anyone.”

 _Without telling me_ , Kakashi heard. A bit of shame spread down his back, like the water dripping off his hair. He didn’t say anything, and after a moment, Kabuto resumed his work, this time eradicating any chance of scarring.

It _was_ unusual for Kabuto to wear a flak jacket in public like this, Kakashi thought again. It was cold out, normally he’d put on an actual jacket or coat. And he didn’t like wearing the blacks out— that was a home outfit, and he’d actually usually be wearing Kakashi’s old ones, worn soft by many washings.

Did Kabuto throw the jacket on in haste before heading out? He must have, because he must have been—

“I’m sorry,” Kakashi said quietly, “for worrying you.”

Outside, the rain was growing quieter. Sunlight was reaching pink fingers into the mouth of the cave, and birds began to call to each other as the day began.

Kabuto finished his work and brought his hands down to his thighs again. Kakashi’s forearm showed no signs of the laceration.

Kabuto opened his mouth to say something, then closed it, setting it back into the same line it was before, though less firm. He looked tired, Kakashi thought, and reached up to brush some hair out of Kabuto’s eyes. His fingers brushed the corner of Kabuto’s eye and Kabuto blinked a few times. Kakashi spread his fingers into Kabuto’s hair and smoothed his thumb down his cheek.

After a long moment, Kabuto sighed. He closed his eyes and turned his face into Kakashi’s hand. The metal of his glasses cut into the meat of Kakashi’s palm. “I’m always going to be worrying about you,” he said. “I just- now you’re hokage, and I-”

“And you what?” Kakashi interrupted. Kabuto opened his eyes. “What does my having to be hokage have to do with us?”

A faint blush spread across Kabuto’s cheeks slightly at _us._ He swallowed and looked down, then licked across his chapped bottom lip. “You’re hokage, so if you go missing, I have to go find you as a- duty to the preservation of the position, of the village, and I don’t-” He raised his chin to look Kakashi in the eyes. “I don’t like it.”

Kakashi didn’t know what to say. “You don’t have to find me if I go missing,” he stumbled through words, searching for something reassuring. “That’s the job for ANBU or whatever the hokage security detail is.” He dropped his hand, feeling useless.

“I want to find you if you’re missing, though,” Kabuto said softly. “Not because you’re hokage. Because you’re…” he trailed off.

Kakashi raised an eyebrow. “An idiot?” he supplied, smiling.

This made Kabuto smile a bit, though he rolled his eyes. “No, but you are.”

“Ah, but we knew that.”

Kakashi did want to know what Kabuto meant, and he had an idea about the first part, but not the second, and he knew better than to push.

“Because you’re mine,” Kabuto finished, his voice barely audible. He reached forward and took one of Kakashi’s hands.

Kakashi nearly bit his tongue.

He pulled his mask down and took Kabuto’s face in his hands, pressing a soft kiss to his mouth. Kabuto made a soft hum against his lips, fingers wrapping around Kakashi’s wrists.

“I’m yours,” Kakashi breathed, kissing Kabuto a second, a third time.

He pulled back slowly and rested his forehead against Kabuto’s. Kabuto didn’t wear a forehead protector. Kakashi didn’t think he ever would again. He didn’t blame him.

At that thought, something clicked in Kakashi’s mind, and he pulled back to look Kabuto in the eyes. He brought their hands down between them. “Is this about Orochimaru?” he asked before he could rethink the question.

Kabuto blinked, surprised, and then his mouth twisted. “Yes.”

Where Kakashi’s chest had just felt full, it now sank.

“I had to make sure he was safe and healthy. I had to run operations if he was out of commission, I…” Kabuto exhaled, losing momentum. “I don’t want to be a right hand tasked with a life, by fear. I don’t want to do that anymore. This situation... reminded me of it.”

“Well, I don’t- I don’t want you to treat me like I'm the leader of an organization,” Kakashi tried. Kabuto raised an eyebrow at him as if to say, _like you aren’t?_ “If I go missing,” Kakashi continued, looking down at their hands resting on Kabuto’s knees. He turned Kabuto’s palms up and rubbed his thumbs over them in slow circles. “And you want to find me, then find me. Make it as simple as that.

“Besides, I was on my way back.” Kakashi met Kabuto’s eyes. _To you_ , he wanted to say. It felt like too much.

He said it anyway.

Kabuto smiled.

This time, he looked down at their hands. He folded his fingers over Kakashi’s thumbs. “I saw your security detail,” Kabuto said, the corner of his mouth turned up, “they passed this place and went in multiple directions. I wouldn’t say they’re very bright.”

“Mm, you ought to give them a break,” Kakashi said, pulling his hands back. Kabuto stood and brushed the dirt off his pants. He extended a hand and Kakashi took it, letting himself get pulled up. His back was stiff, and popped when he stretched his arms above his head. “They’re casting a wide web or something.”

“I’ve found you, so they’re wasting their time now,” Kabuto said, his eyes dancing in the dawn’s light with a mischief Kakashi couldn’t place. “And speaking from experience… you shouldn’t waste their time any further.”

Kakashi frowned. Weren’t they done with this?

Kabuto leaned down to pick up Kakashi’s flak jacket off the floor and handed it to him. Kakashi slipped it over his arms and went to zip it, but Kabuto was already there, his deft hands batting Kakashi’s away. He patted his palms on Kakashi’s chest. “You are hokage,” Kabuto said, his eyes on the old rips and stains on the vest. “Whether you like it or not.”

Kakashi pulled his mask up over his nose and grunted. Kabuto patted his cheek.

“I _don’t_ like it,” Kakashi said, nearly a grumble.

“I know.” Kabuto tied Kakashi’s forehead protector around his head, and pulled it down over his left eye as if the sharingan was still there. Kakashi smiled and pushed it up.

Kabuto opened his mouth, exhaled, and closed it again. “Just... don’t avoid it with these death wishes, okay?”

“Okay.” Kakashi nodded.

Kabuto took his hand and turned, leading him through the mouth of the cave and out.

At the edge of the cliff, Kakashi stopped walking.

“It was just a mission,” Kakashi said, a bit awkwardly, as if he needed to explain himself, or share a vulnerability in exchange for the one Kabuto had shared earlier. He looked out through the trees and avoided Kabuto’s eyes, though he knew they were on him. “I missed it.” He paused for a moment. “Sometimes I think that’s…” he looked back at Kabuto, his expression a bit sad, and lost. “All I really know.”

Kabuto looked at him for a long moment.

Then, he squeezed Kakashi’s hand.

“I understand,” Kabuto said. His gaze was knowing, and soft, and he waited for Kakashi as if he had all the time in the world. As if he knew Kakashi didn’t want to talk about this now, or ever. Or maybe he didn’t know, but Kakashi appreciated the space he was being given all the same.

“Let’s go home?” Kakashi asked.

Kabuto tilted his head. “Home,” he tested the word on his tongue. “Sure.”

He squeezed Kakashi’s hand again.

“Let’s go home.”

**Author's Note:**

> these days have made a change in me  
> I can see they’ve changed you too
> 
> take me to the green grass, take me down the line  
> take me to the chapel, everything will be fine  
> over and over I will take your name  
> and nothing will be different and nothing be the same
> 
>  _time is wasting_ , josh ritter
> 
> * * *
> 
> the incredible art is by rem! (@rembonbon on twitter, @furanobon on tumblr)  
> those panels inspired me to write this piece, and her support encouraged me to finish, clean, and post it. thank you, sweetie.
> 
> big thanks to @skittidyne for reading through this and always cheerleading me on, especially to return to writing after years of nothing. <3 ilu bb, you are my rock.


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